10 Great Management Lessons We Can Learn From Gabbar Singh

Most of us know Gabbar Singh as the despicable villain of the greatest Bollywood movie ever made, Sholay. But Gabbar was more than just a ruthless dacoit he was also a management and marketing genius. While he wasn't terrorizing the helpless villagers of Ramgarh, he was giving management lessons in the Chambal School of Management. Just look at all the things we can learn from him about building a successful business

1. Competitive Analysis

When Kaalia and his gang came back empty handed from Ram-Garh, the first thing Gabbar asked them was "Kitney aadmi the?" Like any great manager, he sought to find out about his competition.

2. Brand Building

Gabbar put it very nicely. When mums in a locality put their kids to sleep saying "Gabbar aa jayega," you're a bonafide marketing whiz!

3. Fair HR Practices

Before Gabbar Singh punished his subordinates, he thought that 6 bullets for 3 people would be unfair. "6 goli, aur aadmi teen, bahut nainsaafi hai!" So, to be fair, he removed three bullets from the revolver.

4. Seeking Feedback From Staff

When Gabbar is about to pop Kaalia, he doesn't just take a unilateral decision. Like a good democratic leader, he asks for opinions. "Tera kya hoga Kaaliya?"

5. Downsizing

No one likes to let go of their employees. But sometimes, you just have to bite the bullet and "fire" a few people. Gabbar Singh did exactly that when he shot all three of his subordinates after laughing like a maniac. "Jo darr gaya, samjho mar gaya!"

6. Clearing All Dues In Time

Thakur put Gabbar in jail. That didn't go down too well with Gabbar. So, he promised "Bahut pachtaugey Thakur, bahut pachtaogey." On escaping prison, Gabbar immediately proceeded to murder Thakur's entire family. Debt cleared.

7. Hostile Take-Overs

On discovering that Thakur's hands were really strong, Gabbar immediately wanted to have them for himself. "Ye haath, humko de de Thakur!" Even though Thakur was not willing to part with his most prized assets, Gabbar cut them off and took them anyway.

8. Employee Motivation

Gabbar wanted Basanti to dance, but she was feeling quite shy. Through close observation, he found out that Basanti and Veeru were madly in love with each other. "Bahut yaarana lagta hai." So, he motivated her to shake a leg by threatening to kill Veeru in front of her.

9. Performance Based Incentive Plans

To make sure that Basanti kept dancing, Gabbar linked her performance with her lover Veeru's life. "Jab tak tere pair chalengey, tab tak iski saans chalegi."

10. Never Underestimate Your Competition

Even Gabbar's mistakes are a lesson to any budding management graduate. After Jai and Veeru killed his whole gang, Gabbar came face to face with Thakur. He looked at the "un-armed" old man, laughed and said, "Tu kya ladega mujhse Thakur!" He shouldn't have, because Thakur then beat him to death with just his feet.

16 Funny Shop Signs You’ll Only See In India

I am of the firm belief that India is hands down, the funniest country in the world. Don't believe me? Just step out to the market one day and take a look around at some of the signs above the shops. Our stores signs are often creative, sometimes inappropriate and always funny. Here are just a few. 

1. How about some Status Update Chowmein?

2. How engineers end up in India.

3. Not sure how this works...

4. LoL. It's Murg Donalds. 

5. Roughly translates to "Hospital For Injured Shoes." 

6. In other news, Facebook Fast Food acquired Whatsapp Maggi Point for 10,000 rupees.

7. "Andar"wear. Because, you know, you wear it "inside."

8. Either he's out and proud or he has no idea what he's doing. 

9. I want some "cool 'n' crisp chikan!"

10. You'll either get it or you won't.

11. "Please don't do 'okay okay.'"This is one frustrated shopkeeper.

12. On the top, "Lioness' Milk... Available here."

13. Much discount! So cheap! Wow!

14. Hahahaha. "Notorious Egg Dudes."

15. Sardar Fish 'N Chicken. Made using Karnail Singh's secret recipe. 

16. Choley you just can't wait for...

20 WTF Signboards You Will Only See In India

If one would be asked to define India in three words, they would be, "What the fuck?" Our country is full of crazy and hilarious things. Our signboards are no exception. Here are just a few of the most WTF signboards you’ll see only in India

1. I'll have my tea in liquid form please. And please, no logic.

2. You can almost hear it in your head.

3. Hotel Google. I wonder what a Google search will throw up?

4. I could really use a Child Bear right now.

5. Now this is what you call a multi-speciality hospital.

6. A truly international fruit stall.

7. No alcohole allowed.

8. Bugger off, Baggers. 

9. Looks like someone took a dump on this one.

10. Plane Paint. It's the "In" thing this season.

11. Thanks. Who needs Google Maps?

12. Are you an "animals" type man?

13. Full power sexism.

14. This is a "Bar Bar" Shop. You have to come here again and again.

15. Shake your Buty Lades...

16. Oh Snap!

17. Okay. If you say so.

18. Cum, take a bath.

19. Happy Endings Guaranteed.

20. Silence of the psychos.

10 Silly Hoaxes Which Took Indians For A Ride

The Internet is a treasure chest of amazing finds. At times, you come across certain images and pieces of information that truly blows your mind. But another thing about the Internet is that not everything you find in there is really true. Here are 10 hoaxes that found their way to 'believability' thanks to the internet.

1. A photo that went viral on Facebook with the title, "India during Diwali."

Fact:
This message went viral in India on the occasion of Diwali. The message came with a picture showing the satellite image of the Indian map during the day, followed by the same during the night, appearing bright and colorful throughout. However, the message was a hoax. The image in question is put up by National Geophysical Data Center of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, USA and is actually a composite satellite view of India at night, showing the change in night illumination during the period 1992-2003. Satellite data from the year 1992 is shown in blue color, 1998 green colored, and that in 2003 is colored red. This stunning composite satellite image of India at night was developed by NASA so as to illustrate the increasing population of India over the years.

2. The "Original" Swiss Bank statement to India.

Fact:
There are so many false features in the letter that it's a miracle anyone actually believed it.  Firstly, the official address to India is "Government of India" and not "Indian Government." Secondly, the amount in the bank accounts are mentioned in INR, that too using the Indian denomination system whereas the Swiss bank operates in US dollars, Euro pound, and GB pound, not INR. The telephone code of the bank mentioned in the address section of the letter is 0044, which is actually the code for the U.K. The international code of Switzerland is 0041. Also, the sign of the bank manager is on the right side end of the letter, where as the European system of communication and correspondence uses the left corner of the page for signatures.

3. The Indian three headed snake.

Fact:
This picture showing a live three headed snake on an Indian road started circulating on many social networking websites. The message that comes with the picture states that it is a beautiful creation of nature. The story however, is a hoax. The three headed snake picture is not real, it is a photoshopped one.

4. "UNESCO declares Indian National Anthem as best in the world."

Fact: 
This story was very widely circulating through emails, blogs and social networking sites. The message claiming that the Indian national anthem "Jana gana mana.." was selected as the best in the world by UNESCO was never heard of or confirmed by any kind of news or media reports. If the story was factual, it would have definitely received wide attention from the media. If the UNESCO released such a statement, it would be readily available on their official website, which is no where to be seen. India Today wrote to UNESCO to get clarity on these stories and got a confirmation message from UNESCO that these messages were indeed a hoax. 

5. Indian woman gives birth to 11 kids at once!

Fact:
The photograph which shows 11 new born babies along with hospital staff was accompanied by a message claiming that an Indian woman gave birth to all of them in a single delivery, and considers it as God's miracle. 6 out of the 11 babies were reported to be twins. The photograph is genuine, but the story is a hoax. The photograph actually shows 11 kids born to different mothers on 11.11.11 at the 21st Century Hospital & Test Tube Baby Center in Surat, India. The doctors and hospital staff together with the new born babies took photographs and shared it as an interesting achievement on 11.11.11.

6. Pictures showing the excavation site of a giant human skeleton. 

 

Fact:
Many versions of this story were circulating through emails along with these pictures of giant human skeletons. The news related to this story appeared in the media in countries like India, Bangladesh etc. However, all these versions were false. The pictures depicting giant human skeletons are actually a part of image manipulation contest conducted by worth1000.com.

7. Hanuman Gadha found during an excavation in Sri Lanka.

 

Fact:
This picture claims to show the Hindu God Hanuman's Gadha (mace), supposedly discovered during an excavation in Sri Lanka. Other versions said it is the world's largest Gada of Veer Hanuman discovered in Gujarat. The claims are not true. It actually shows a 45 feet Gada replica  for installation on a 125-foot-high Hanuman statue on the outskirts of Indore, India on the occasion of Hanuman Jayanti (birthday) on 25 April 2013. (As quoted in Hindustan Times epaper.)

8. Bhagat Singh was hanged on the 14th of February, Valentine's Day.

Fact:
This hoax was a  rather unfortunate and disrespectful mis-interpretation of Bhagat Singh's biography. Bhagat Singh was arrested following the 1929 Assembly bomb throwing incident. Fearing civil agitation, the then Viceroy of India Lord Irwin set up a special tribunal called the Privy Council to speed up his trail process. An Indian defence committee in Punjab appealed against the Privy Council, which was again dismissed by the  Judge Viscount Dunedin. After the rejection, the then Congress party president Madan Mohan Malviya filed a mercy appeal before Lord Irwin on 14 February 1931, but even that did not work, and Bhagat Singh was hung on 23 March 1931 at 7:30 pm in Lahore jail along with fellow freedom fighters Rajguru and Sukhdev.

9. "Important message from Delhi Police: Frooti can contain HIV."

 

Fact:
This story broke on Facebook walls and Whatsapp chats all over India. A supposed warning from the Delhi Police warned consumers that a worker from the "Frooti Company" was HIV positive and had added his blood to the drink mix. It also claimed that the story had been reported by NDTV. As you can guess, the whole thing was a hoax. Both the Delhi Police and NDTV denied the ridiculous story. Besides one can't even get AIDS through "infected" food. 

10. A mysterious tree sighted in Nalgonda, Andhra Pradesh, India.

Fact:
The messages showed pictures of a tree with mysterious wooden carvings of various animals like crocodiles, monkeys, snakes, spiders and others; claiming that it is a 'Baobab' tree that has the largest trunk in the world. The message stated that this mysterious tree was found near a hermitage in the dense forests of Nalgonda, Andhra Pradesh, India. The truth? There was no mysterious tree or hermitage. This was in fact an art work in Disney Land.